What to Tell the Kids
When Parents Separate
If you are going through a separation and feel that the children need some answers, it can be very stressful knowing what to say in explanation to the children.
Not having an idea how to handle everything that is going on, and explain to the children what you are going through whilst still keeping them on both sides and not to worry or frighten them.
Even if you’ve tried everything and you still cannot get along, make sure that your kids understand this has nothing to do with them.
They can feel OK if they enjoy the company of the in-laws, and they should. Hopefully, as you see your kids developing bonds with the in-laws, you may start to change your tune about your relationship. If the kids can’t bring you together in harmony, then what will? Having kids can help redefine relationships within families, and usually for the better.
So keep the air light and respectful and the children will see that even though you are not together, they can still see both of you are still there for them and that they will always be loved no mater what.
They need to be able to see tat they can still come to both of you and be able to talk and say whatever is worrying them.
Not all marriages stay bolted together for ever, and the children can immediately feel that . whatever is going on is their fault.
This can be demonstrated in your child suddenly starting to wet the bed, not eating their food, not talking , regressing in their development.
Some children will even start having nightmares and panic attacks It can actually show itself in many different ways which can even lead the children to requiring counselling in the long run.
This is not acceptable and the parents must always remember this, and protect their children when they are talking about processes and details and ensure they do not argue in front of the children.